New New York

We had a roller coaster of a year.  I mean, another one.  We don't do things by halves. Most people get a new car or buy a new house or a boat when they need a 'change'. Others dump their boyfriends or have an affair.  Some go on holiday.  I find moving countries is rather more effective.  I've done it 6 times now and each time it brings renewed vigor and vitality to my life. For a while.  My maximum stint in any new country has been 5 years.

In 2012 we moved to New York City.  I mean, we really did. Really.  It wasn't some fantastic dream - it happened.  How often does that kind of opportunity come along - to have your husband go 'Uh honey, how do you feel about New York'? How do I FEEL about New York? I freaking LOVE New York. Are you kidding me? It's the capitol of the world.  New York is everything - it has everything. Everyone fantastically awesome is either FROM New York or lives here.  Really - so HOW do I feel about Nww York? In what context? Food? OVER the top amazing. THEATRE? The best in the world.  SHOPPING? Come. On.  Museums and Galleries? Sensational.  PLUS you get 4 actual seasons which means 4 wardrobe changes.  I see NO down side.  Plus  it's a 6 1/2 hour flight to my other favorite city in the world  - London (lived there)  - instead of that monstrous 27 hour 2 day extravaganza.  So, yeah. I kind of like it.  'That's a yes then?' says my husband.  'Yes to what?'  I asked,  suddenly confused.  'You wanna move there?'.  I really love my husband.  

There was a brief lapse of gleefulness when I remembered that we have a 4 year old.  A four year old human boy child who has a life in Sydney too.  He's had half of his life there.  The first half was in Dublin (we were there 3 years in total).  He has gorgeous friends and a wonderful school, fields to run in and beaches to play on, sand castles to build and a rugby captaincy to aspire to. He has barbecues to scrape down and snakes/spiders and a host of other life-threatening beasties to avoid.   My son is an Australian by choice - he will tell you even now after 7 months in New York with his American twang that he is indeed an Australian.  But I'm South African, my husband is Scottish, our families are in those 2 countries respectively and we somehow landed up in Australia - which geographically makes no sense, but what actually ever really makes sense? 

The truth is we don't make as much sense anywhere else as we do in New York because New York is a global melting pot of divergent, eclectic cultures, religions and ethnicities.  Everyone from everywhere is welcome in New York.  They LOVE our accents, love that we're different, they welcome our quirky colloquialisms with generous good humor.  New York is about YES. The people are hospitable and welcoming.  They have totally disarmed me with their no bullshit, life-affirming generosity.  I mean, New York had the most ferociously violent attack in modern history perpetrated against it. New York knows devastation and loss so she knows that there is a bigger picture.  Don't get me wrong, the small stuff is shouted about across streets from taxi driver to taxi driver.  Highly caffeinated cabbies quibble over impulsive lane changes and the absence of indicator signals.  But the general, pervasive feeling in the city is one of community.  The real stuff, the big stuff is the focus.   We had only been here a few months when the monstrous storm collided with our chosen island and we experienced the incredible indomitable spirit of that great city and we were energized and heartened that shit goes wrong, but people make it right again together.

So, come rain (sleet, snow, hail) or come shine - we're New Yorkers for now.   Sometimes I hide inside just to press pause for a moment.  Sometimes I feel like I just want to stand in Times Square and absorb that electric current of energy.  The air is caffeinated here.... and y'all know that coffee is my drug of choice!

Happy Thanksgiving

I wanted to wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving!


I am grateful for my beautiful boys, my wonderful parents and loving parents-in-law. 
I'm grateful for our family, both blood and selected and for the best friends I could wish for. 
I am grateful for the privilege of living in arguably the greatest city in the world and experience highlights that have raised my expectations and extended my bucket list. 
Mostly, I'm grateful for the opportunity to live the life of my dreams and to raise our son in a world that is ever more loving, enlightened, giving and accepting. Happy Thanksgiving EVERYONE!

Moved

It must surprise you to know that despite my lithe athletic figure, I'm not a great dancer.  I struggled through 3 years of Physical Theatre at University, artlessly maneuvering my graceless physique across dusty sound proofed stages.  I spent my undergraduate years not morphing into a beautiful swan, but rather a cumbersome Dalmatian - covered head to toe in large dark bruises, my tail between my legs and my enthusiasm to one day hit the Broadway stage as the next Shirley MacLaine triple-threat entirely obliterated.

I immersed myself in the history of dance, learning about Twyla Tharp, Martha Graham, Pina Bausch and Alvin Ailey.  I marvelled at their creativity and their ability to reconfigure what people perceived as 'dance'.  I may not have been any kind of dancer, but I respect the athleticism and enormous creativity and determination that dance demands.

My eyes glistened with tears as I took my son to his first day of pre-school in New York City and discovered that the Alvin Ailey dance theatre is across the road. Every day we walk by and watch these beautiful creatures leap majestically in classes 5 stories high and 5 rooms wide.  A marvellous Rubik's Cube of diversity and brilliance.

I have found many things in my life that I can do well and learned along the way that being an appreciative connoisseur of fine things is more satisfying than being a bitter, defeated critic.  So many parts of my life have shown themselves to me in this city over the last 5 months here.  New York is like a giant magnifying mirror.  I'm so grateful that I like what I see.

Sandy vs Horror-Crane

I'm the opposite of a hypochondriac - my initial reaction is always "It'll be fine don't worry about it". When news reports started talking about a 'hurricane' on the way, I took my usual approach to things:  I confirmed our restaurant reservation and babysitter and went out for dinner.

My husband, our friend and I were amused by the dramatic signs confirming stores would be closed until further notice. We joked about the boarded up windows as we meandered up Broadway to Cafe Luxembourg on the Upper West Side.   As we sat down and noticed that Liam Neeson was at the table opposite us (no joke) we were comforted and felt sure that this 'hurricane' business was nothing to worry about.  

A bottle or 2 of red wine later, we exited the restaurant to howling winds and our smirks were somewhat reduced.  Monday was a weird day - eerily still, the streets were empty, the stores were all shut and we sat in our apartment waiting for something to happen.  I've never been anywhere near a hurricane before.  I knew all about Katrina but surely that couldn't happen in Manhattan? I decided to spend the day in our West 56th street apartment in my jeans, hair scraped back in an unwashed pony tail and no make up on... Might I add that I have NEVER done that before. I am a make up whore and haven't left my house without mascara since I was 15.  And then there was a knock at the door and 3 burly rather gorgeous firefighters stood there in full Hollywood disaster movie garb and said they had 'bad news' for us, the 95 story crane behind our apartment had flipped over and was dangling precariously and we had to evacuate IMMEDIATELY. It seemed the wrong time to say that I needed to put some make up on.  We threw some clothes into a backpack, took a teddy bear and a fluffy blanket for my now very excited 4 year old son and we left. 

Outside, the rain bucketed down and the winds were intense.  We walked 35 blocks to our friends' apartment on 30th street where we hoped to stay over night until we could return home.  Shortly after we got there, all the power went out.  Absolute darkness, no television and no WiFi.  We had no idea what was going on around us aside from the limited internet connection which provided a twitter feed and the occasional text message.  The last glimmer of 3G coverage provided me with one last tweet which read 'All bridges and tunnels from Manhattan have been closed.  There is no way of exiting the island now."  Why hadn't we brought Liam Neeson home with us?!

At that point my imagination went wild.  What if Manhattan just sank into the sea and we all just disappeared? My husband and the friends we were staying with suggested we should all just get some sleep.  I tried, but spent most of the night awake staring at my beautiful sleeping son and wondering what the hell we were doing in this crazy storm-ravaged city.

In the morning we left their apartment and walked up Madison Avenue towards Midtown to ascertain what damage had been done.  The streets were soaked and covered with trash, mangled umbrellas littered every corner and thousands of people meandered about just staring at each other.  As we walked, we heard more and more about the damage and destruction in Lower Manhattan, Jersey and Long Island... the cars floating down streets, the facades of buildings ripped off, the deaths and the loss of homes. After months of non-stop election coverage and relentless campaigning, the stark reality of what is truly important in this country has begun to set in.  

It is several days later now and we are still homeless, we spent a few nights in the darkness of 30th street, showering in our friend's hotel room in midtown and trying to ascertain when exactly the crane will be secured so that we can go home.  We are intensely grateful for the kindness of friends - and indeed strangers - but mostly that we are indoors safely together as a family.

Back to Barbra

Anyone who knows me knows that I love Barbra and Oprah above all others.  For me Barbra and Oprah are the 2 people who have transcended superstardom and become something else.  I admire their innate strength, the tenacity it took to rise from virtual poverty to unimaginable wealth and success. I admire that there is no other previous generation of Winfrey or Streisand who provided nepotistic ease.  These 2 women have succeeded without any help, without any casting couches or plastic surgery, without conforming to what society deems 'beautiful' and without ever cowering to their critics.

For me, they stand apart and unsurpassed. I've met many celebrities in my life but I can't imagine being face to face with either one of these ladies - I don't think I could do it.  I feel like most celebrities have become quite depressingly normal - they're so normal that they've become something to be derided and ridiculed rather than something to aspire to.  I have no interest in the 'famous for being famous' generation of talentless neophytes who flash their vagina's while exiting limousines simply to be in the newspaper the following day.

The dominant theme in our society has become one of numb disenchantment and apathy - like we don't actually care about anything much.  As a result the overly lipsticked, spray-tanned, plastic-titted morons who pollute our TV screens seem enough for us.  Oh we've had such a hard day, can't be arsed to think or be challenged, don't give a shit about politics or literature so Snooki and the gang are enough.

Every time I see something like the magical and moving performance Barbra Streisand gave last night in Brooklyn, my soul is restored.  I feel buoyant.  I feel joy.  I am inspired to try harder, to do more, to aspire and reach and be better.  It makes me angry that mostly people are proffering themselves as willing sacrificial lambs at the alter of stupidity - it's like 'here take my brain please - pulverise it and make me vapid'.  Please people - find something that refuels you and makes you MORE. Stop living your life as if you're on an etch a sketch and becoming erased more and more every day.

My 4 year old loves Batman, Spiderman, the Transformers and Ben 10 because of their superpowers and because they seem impossibly brave, brilliant and fantastic.  I have my superheroes too.  He went to bed in his batman pajamas last night and I went to bed in my Barbra Streisand t-shirt.

The Best

You know what is super-satisfying about being in New York? Everyone is the BEST at what they do.  I love it. I love that the coffee making peeps at Starbucks are excellent - they know their shit and they get it done quickly and with a smile. The waiters everywhere actually KNOW the menu, can recommend side dishes and are proud of the food they serve. The shop attendants bring you items to try on, suggest better sizes and help you style a complete outfit.  They don't just schlump in a corner texting and chewing gum.  There is a relentless can-do attitude and a willingness to go the extra mile. I'll tell you something, these people deserve their tips. They work for them.

I feel like at some point (we can all probably guess when), there was a city-wide attitude adjustment - a great big re-think and re-prioritizing.  There is collective 'don't sweat the small stuff' mindset here. There is no time to mess around and be shoddy.  People are efficient, friendly and highly functional.  The days of the neurotic, anxiety-ridden Seinfeld of the 90s are over.

This is a city that you graduate TO - when you're the best at what you do.  That whole cream of the crop, top of the heap thing - it's true.  New York doesn't do mediocre.

Great Intentions

Yes I intended to blog every week but I got busy.  New York is FULL ON!  I don't know how people do the whole moving to New York to write thing. I am too busy to write.

It has been an intense month. The first couple of weeks were pretty awful.  Between the intense heat and the horrible jet lag, nothing felt right. You see, there's the 'perception' of moving to New York and then there is the 'reality' of moving to New York.... and then there is the 'reality of moving to New York WITH A FOUR YEAR OLD'.

As with anything, there is a period of adjustment and a period of transition. We are still in that.  I think it actually takes 18-24 months to settle in anywhere and really immerse oneself in the full experience of living in a new city.  We won't be here that long so it is a case of cramming in all the good bits and trying to skim over the crappy bits.  We were just about coming out into the light at the end of the tunnel after 2 years in Sydney so it is quite challenging to start at Go again.

That said, I absolutely love New York City and I feel very comfortable here.  It is such a melting pot of diversity and cultures.  I don't feel in the slightest bit out of place or foreign.  The people everywhere are exceptionally friendly (except the shop assistants on the Upper East side).  I am pretty sure I will pull out Edina's 'You only work in a shop you know, you can drop the attitude' at some point.

I feel very lucky to be here in what is without question the capitol of the World. Everything happens here - good and bad. Everything you can possible imagine is available - and not only is it available it can be delivered RIGHT NOW.  The theatre, the museums, the art, the shopping - everything here is in a league of its own.  There is something very satisfying about being in the epicentre of everything. There is no FOMO (fear of missing out) in New York City.

I am getting to know the city on foot - the best way.  I walk everywhere.  How in hell Carrie and the girls ponced about in Manolos, I will never know.  I am very happy in my comfy wedges or sneakers because I don't want to limit the experience by having sore feet! I've grown a little bit more sensible in my mid 30s! Sorry to disappoint!  I also don't want to ruin the experience by gaining 20kgs and feeling horrible about myself - so the walking counteracts the EATING.

Oh the food... oh my.  Thankfully, everything has the calorie count written clearly next to it and that kills the mood pretty quickly!

So, a quick rundown of my favourite things so far:

Favourite bar: Press Lounge Rooftop Bar at Ink48
Favourite restaurant: Balthazar (Barry McCurdie you were right)
Favourite food item: French Onion Soup at Balthazar
Favourite Deli: 2nd Avenue Deli in Midtown East
Favourite Cheap Eat: Burger Joint at Parker Meridien
Favourite Department store: Bloomingdales
Favourite Shop:  J Crew and Banana Republic
Favourite Walk: Around Central Park
Favourite Extravagance: Wholefoods at Time Warner

More soon....
XOXO