Tuesday, March 9, 2010

RIP Layla Grace

I felt such a need to write that previous post a few days ago but couldn't post it until today - it wasn't 'ready' yet. It was with intense sadness that I realised that I posted the blog around the same time that sweet Layla Grace met her angels. I hope her heaven is the most perfect, pain free, beautiful place imaginable. Rest In Peace sweet girl. You are safe. You are loved.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Layla Grace

There's a darling little girl in Texas who won't be with us much longer. She's 2 years old and suffering from stage 4 neuroblastoma. This brave little soul has lived much of her life in pain, been through more than anyone of any age should have to deal with and will shortly fly back to heaven. I don't know Layla Grace and I don't know her family. I only found out about her a week ago but I have been so affected by her and her family that I feel like she has completely changed how I respond to things. I think of her, see her little face in my mind and I am heartbroken.

The outpouring of love and support for Layla and her family on Twitter, Facebook and their blog (www.laylagrace.org) has been intense. She has highlighted the most positive aspect of social media and shown that people the world over have tremendously big hearts.

Something I read in the blog really struck a chord. Any mother will know that having a toddler means that one inevitably takes twice the normal amount of time to do anything because small kids want to be involved in everything. It can be frustrating and I know that I have sometimes begged the universe to let MacKenzie nap for 5 minutes longer or to sit still just long enough for me to do stuff. Layla Grace's mommy speaks about this - how Layla would disrupt her from unloading the dishwasher or be under her feet while she was trying to do housework in general... and how she'd be noisy and willful and want attention... Now Layla's mom longs for that, wishes she'd try to climb into the dishwasher or be petulant and distracting... They long for her noise. They ache for her to be messy and refuse to nap.

My eyes filled with tears when I read that and I had moment of such clarity and gratitude. My son is messy and noisy and willful and petulant and he climbs into the dishwasher and he draws on the walls and he tramples banana into the carpet and sprays juice all over the place... and he's PERFECT. He's healthy and beautiful and he's here and he's mine and I will never wish him to do anything differently. I want him exactly like this. I am so lucky.