Monday, November 16, 2009

Why You Should Procreate

It took me a while to decide that I was ready to have a baby. I knew that I wanted one, but I also knew that having a child would change everything. I knew that on a purely cerebral level - the only way one can before a baby arrives. I thought I would stay the same, but I'd be me PLUS baby. I thought we would stay the same, but we'd be us PLUS baby.
Of course once a baby arrives, absolutely everything changes and neither you nor your partner nor the relationship nor anyone you are related to or anyone you meet is ever the same again. If you're reading this and are pregnant or considering being pregnant, don't be alarmed. You see, this is what is the difficult part to explain. I can tell you in graphic detail about the cons of parenting. I can tell you that I've been vomited on from every angle and in every hue and shade of every colour. I can tell you I've not slept a full night in 16 months, 3 weeks and 2 days. I can tell you I've recovered my mascara from inside the toilet and that I sometimes go 2 days without showering and that I can consume up to 5 or 6 double strength coffees a day to remain energetic....
Those are the tangible negatives which are very easy to explain. It's the positives that I can't even begin put into words. You see, the moment I saw that howling scarlet little face, every cell in my body woke up and fell head over heels in love. I am so intensely proud of every sound he makes, every morsel he consumes, every minute that he does sleep, every step that he takes - I'm proud even when he's doing nothing at all. I am so filled with overwhelming, giddy love for this tiny person that everything with any negative connotations pales into such nebulous insignificance that it disappears almost entirely. The other people who also love him are elevated in my estimation. I love my husband more, my family more, my friends more. Truly, there is no feeling in the world that compares with the love and joy that children bring with them. They bring it as part of the package. It's a huge and diverse package that arrives after that 40 week wait. More than anyone can prepare you for, more than you can ever be ready for, more than you had any idea would be possible.
But, if you can and you think you might want to...
You should.

4 comments:

Jodie Ansted said...

First time I've read your blog, and it was beautiful. Exactly how I feel. I worry that people without kids yet think all parents do is bitch and moan abut their kids and so why have them? But it is the very best thing in the world, and now I look back and think how empty my life was before I had my 3 boys.

Thanks for sharing this. I'll be back!

Ami said...

Oh my gosh, I got all teary reading this! I'm so glad Jodie sent me this link! I don't have kids yet, but we have decided to start trying early next year. I remember getting the feeling that I was ready to become a Mum. Not because I think I'm perfectly equipped for it or I'm going to know what to do, but because I know that in my heart it's the next stage of our lives.

Such a beautiful post. Can't wait to read some more of your posts. :)

Chanti & David said...

Snap Snap Snap ... share your feelings. I love the way you write M - just plain ol' beautiful! (Sure Mrs Felton/Mrs Moore would be proud!)

dadwhowrites said...

You get to shower every two days?!? Wait till you have another...